When you resort to shouting in conflict, you are reacting in the flesh. You have lost control of the only person you can control: yourself.
Conflict
Francis de Sales
The best remedy I know against sudden fits of impatience is a silence that is gentle and without malice. However little one says, pride always comes into it, and one says things that plunge the heart into grief for a whole day after. When one is silent and smiles in a friendly manner, the storm passes over; one smothers one’s temper and indiscretion, and so enjoys pure and lasting happiness.
John Newton
Assurance grows by repeated conflict, by our repeated experimental proof of the Lord’s power and goodness to save; when we have been brought very low and helped, sorely wounded and healed, cast down and raised again, have given up all hope, and been suddenly snatched from danger, and placed in safety; and when these things have been repeated to us and in us a thousand times over, we begin to learn to trust simply to the word and power of God, beyond and against appearances: and this trust, when habitual and strong, bears the name of assurance; for even assurance has degrees.